That Jerk In Bed 5


It should come as no surprise that some patients can be rude and testy. I mean, people are jerks no matter where they are, but hospitals tend to bring out the worst in people. It can be scary, whether you’re in for a “routine” procedure, or something more serious. We all react in different ways, so I try to be as patient as possible, even when dealing with an ornery patient.

Nurses have long been known to take appropriate steps when dealing with particularly heinous patients, though. Recently we had one such patient, or as we called him “that jerk in bed 5”. When patients call we try to respond as quickly as possible, but we have plenty of patients to deal with and unfortunately, some patients believe they should be the center of our universe.

That jerk in bed 5 would ring incessantly, if a nurse didn’t arrive within a minute he’d ring again, and again, and again. Initially we plotted to teach him a lesson, but as it turns out, he was just lonely and wanted someone to sit down and chat for a minute. I decided that maybe he wouldn’t be such a jerk if someone just spoke to him.

I told him all about my farm and how we raised cows, pigs, and chickens.

Jerk: Why do you have chickens?

Me: So, we can eat the fresh eggs that they lay.

Jerk: Wait, you eat eggs right out a chicken butt?

Me: *laughing* Where do you think they come from?

Jerk: I get mine at the store.